No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
