she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize