Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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