I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
