i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
