If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
