There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
