Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Randomize
