Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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