so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
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