i just had sex bonerless
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize