i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
