Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
