I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
