And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
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Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.