Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I could fuck to npr.
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