Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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