i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Randomize
