Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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