It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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