dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
The air was thick with penises
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
