We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
