I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
