everyone is single if you try hard enough
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
