He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize