this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize