she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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