im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
