I'm going to jail i love you
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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