I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
This house was built for laser tag.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
