the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
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He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
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I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
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