Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Fuck appropriateness.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
