I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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