My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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