Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
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sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
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Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
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