just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
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