i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
