North Korea, Best Korea!
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
