North Korea, Best Korea!
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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