Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Alive.
So much puke
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
