So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Randomize