i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
