Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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