Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize