please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
