Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
