Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
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