dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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