And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
