you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
