it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Randomize
