The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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