Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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